fight nite

Well i am going to try my skills out on the mat in Dallas in Dec. I hope all can come out. I have been training hard and having fun doing it. Rebecca is doing well. The baby has a heart beat (there you go mom) and everything seem like it is going fine. Kmac is loving school but still wont tell us what she has learned. Every once in a while she drops knowledge on us. I am loving work and love being at the firehouse. Until next time.
Justin

baby baby

We are having a baby!!! Rebecca surprised me on my birthday with a positive pregnacy test!!!!! I will update the blog later.

My little girl

Well today started the first day of the rest of Mehkyas life. She is now officially a kinder kid. She seemed great going to school today. Of course Rebecca and I were there and neither of us cried. It was a little sad watching her sit at her desk as we walked out of the room. It got me thinking alot about her future. How will she respond? Will she be diligent with her studies like Rebecca was or will she slack off like her daddy? As of now she doesn't seem very interested but as my cousin Cody told me it takes time for it to sink in. My little girl is growing up. No longer will I be able to pick her up early from day care and take her to get ice cream or drop her off late to school after we have slept in. We need to step up as parents now as well. I am lucky that Rebecca was grounded in her education and knows more about study habits ect... I want to push kmac and I am not really sure how. Rebecca and I both have had conversations about what we could have been if we both would have really applied ourselves in school. I know I never did and am still struggling with school work some 12 years after graduation. I managed to receive my college degree and am working on my masters but I am still lazy as hell. It's time for us both to make sure that Kmac is driven to do her best. I hope we haven't failed her as far as work ethic already.

all is well

I love my job and am so happy with the decision of moving to Lubbock. Unlike Wichita Falls, the guys here treat me like a grown man and not some kid. It is an amazing difference between the two. School is killing me. It's not that I dont want to go, i am just struggling with taking more time away from the family. But things are falling into place for us here and it is a true blessing. I told God that it would be a blessing to get on with the fire department so that I can focus on school so I need to man up and do well in school. If I could just find a way to balance everything it would be really well.

My mom came out to see me. I hope she had a good time here in Lubbock. It always seems that something is on her mind and I wish that she would just relax and get to know herself again. She has been serving so many for so long she needs to take time and serve herself.

Joan and Grandma came along as well and It was really good to see them both. Grandma has been one of the greatest influences in my life and Joan is just great and has the warmest heart. I am glad that everyone came out to see us.

work work work

Well I started my job with the Lubbock FD and I am very excited about what is going on so far. Unlike the WF FD, Lubbock seems to be very professional and more of a family environment. I am going through an orientaion right now for another 4 weeks but it is a good refresher. I am hating not having much time with KMAC right now but once I get through the orienation I will have an abundance. My body is getting beat up pretty good and the younger guys are pushing me hard. I have just got to buckle down and get in better shape. Still wishin that mom would come out and see us. Maybe one day.

I am Israel

I am Israel, promised, blessed and determined
I am Israel, lost, confused and frustrated
I am Israel, led, driven and without need
I am Israel, starving, tired and broken
I am Israel, strong, fed and hopeful
I am Israel, faithless, searching and weak
I am Israel, faithful, found and renewed
I am Israel, addicted to false Idols, deaf and blind
I am Israel, understanding, forgiven, and full of sight
I am Israel, I dont know what the future holds
I am Israel, and I know that the future is bright
I am Israel, I am wandering
I am Israel, and I see the promise land
I am Israel, I dont deserve the promise
I am Israel, and there is nothing I can do to change God's mind
I am Israel, and I was promised this land
I am Israel, and I am disobedient
I am Israel, and I will become obedient
I am Israel, and I will enter the promise land........

The tooth the tooth the tooth is on fire!!

Well I understand the saying "its like pulling teeth" Rebecca spent an hour trying to cajole Kmac to let her pull her teeth and then I spent another 30 min and she just would not let us. It is funny how the smallest of things can teach you alot about yourself. My biggest struggle as a father is that no matter what I say to convince mehkya that she is going to be ok she doesn't trust me. That lack of trust drives me crazy. I am so impatient with it. It like the tooth, I kept telling her that It was for the best but she just didn't want any of what I was cooking. Of course afterwards she is all full of joy and so happy. This happens a lot with us. In Galveston she didn't want to ride the big rides or boogy board until I made her do it and then she loved it. The entire time I was getting upset with her. Well the tooth is out and to make things even better we went ahead and pulled its twin as well.

Tooth Fairy

Well Mehkya has her first loose tooth and for the past week has been so excited about it being pulled. She even watched a show about how to pull teeth. All week in Galveston she wiggled it and until last night it wasn't ready to come out. All day long I kept telling her that by supper time it would be ready to pull and all day she was so excited about it.....Until last night when I sat her down and took a pull on it. It would come out and pain came over her face so quickly. her thrill of pulling her tooth went away pretty quickly. I think she just wants to keep it in there now. Oh well we will try again tonight.....

I have got to lose some weight. Between my knees and ankles I have been real inactive the past few weeks. Rebecca and I made a plan to start really watching what we eat and working out more starting today. I am going to update this thing daily about my progress. Today I rode around the neighborhood on my bike and ate real well. The bike ride was nice until the wind picked up and made me realize how out of shape I am. I hate the wind!

Well it's good to be home and to be blogging again. I promise i will figure this thing out before too long and have some pictures on it. Joan thanks for being a wonderful person! I just want to throw that out there.

Galveston O' Galveston

Well we made it to Galveston on Wednesday. Mehkya is already saying that she is going to move here when she grows up. I can't wait to take her to FL in the next year or so so that she can see a real beach. I dont know if y'all know but I live with the two of the most girly girls in the world. I was excited about getting KMAC out on the body board but she wasn't having much of that. She did like it when she tried it but she was more inteterested in finding shells and looking "fancy" on the beach. Her idea of fancy is wearing a flower bikini, sitting in a lounge chair with her sunglasses resting on her nose with a lemonade that has an umberella in it. She also said it needed salt around the glass but we wont get into that one.

Our place is nice and has a wonderful view of the beach. We went on a dolphin tour that both girls really liked and went to shlitterbahn (sp?) and swam a lot. Today we are off to Moody Gardens to look at the sharks.

On a personal note, this place is wonderful for realizing how hot my wife is. She is and has been the best looking woman on the island. As for me, being away gets me thinking about how I need to refocus on my walk. I have a great family and need to be a better leader.

We have two more days here in G-town and while I like the beach I miss the dry heat of West Texas and my king sized bed.

Flip Flop Blowout got me into the "IN" crowd

I hope I dont step on anyones toes here. I love to people watch. It is a sign of getting older and I completely understand why you see 85 year old men watching people pass by as they sit on a chair in the mall. Tonight we went to Golden Corral. Rebecca and her father love it and I dont mind it at all. I was walking to get my food and my flip flop had a blow out. It was gone, and there wasn't any way to fix it. I figure I should just go barefoot. I mean why not, I would have fit in with everyone else. I was among the most backwards people I have ever seen. Mothers with their cracks showing as they were carrying their babies to the ice cream line. Little kids that weigh too much for their age eating only desert and the mullett crowd loving the dinner rolls. The cool guy with the duck tail eating off his plate in line - maybe he thought it would get cold before he got to his table. Anyway I just thought it funny sitting there and watching everyone doing their own thing.

West Texas

There is something amazing about living in West Texas. Maybe it's that the people still act out the Texas values that many of us were raised on, maybe it's the lack of traffic and the ease to get from point A to point B without any hassel or maybe it's the dry heat that feels really good on my balding noggin. I am not sure but it is really nice out here. I miss Dallas. I miss the nightlife and the ability to go see the cowboys or rangers play. We are taking a trip to galveston next week and being out here makes it an extra 5 or 6 hours but that is ok. I am sure that Mehkya will see about a thousand slug bugs on the way and i wont be able to use my arm for a week from her non stop pounding that I receive everytime she sees a slug bug. It's fun though! I am trying to keep my eyes on the road and drive friendly, she is searching for slug bugs with clinched fist ready to pounce on me. It's not too fair! THe other day I asked her to go clean her room and her response made me laugh.. She said "daddy are you asking me or telling me to clean my room? Cause if you are asking me then I have the right to say NO" I was shocked! Anyway back to West Texas. It is nice out here, things are falling into place for us but there is one thing I cannot stand...............................The wind never stops blowing! We bought a pool, the wind blows the cover off, We needed rain but it only comes with the wind. I water my yard and only one side gets wet because of the wind!! But it is all good. Wish that some family would come out and see where we are. I miss Big D but am loving West Texas

Suffering

It's been a while since I have written. i am still struggling through school. I am very excited about learning about the OT, but man it is really dry. I didn't do very well on my test (81) and I have a two papers due next week that I am putting off. I really hate writing. I have had a really tough few days with my thoughtlife. I feel that I am being haunted by my family's past. I dont know much about my father, but I do know that he was pretty lazy and didn't have much ambition. In my thoughts I am feeling the same way. I really want to do well in school, I want to hear God's voice and i want to be a great father, husband ect... But there seems to be something blocking me from being better. I blame it on not having a father figure when I was young and try to justify my laziness. I am struggling with being at one place in my life and then the next wanting to be somewhere else. It's kind of like the Fire Department job. It is all i know and all i feel that I can do, but at the same time I dont feel it is my call in life. I feel like I am going to go to work on July 14th and then retire on July 14th 2028. When do we realize that this is where and what we need to be doing? Am I suppose to be a fireman? Am I suppose to be in the Ministry? I dont know. I am really not faithful enough to be in the Ministry full time, and i am not motivated to be a firefighter all the time. I hate not knowing where I am or where I am suppose to be!

Blessed

It was very tough telling my story to the high school kids. I wasn't able to share my faith but I am confident that the message was passed and that seeds were planted. The first presentation went well and the chalk art turned out ok. the crowd loved it and I felt really good about the entire thing. Give God the credit. The second performance was a little different. There were a lot more people there and I had to shorten the message. I got a little lost while speaking and struggled finding the words to speak, all in all it turned out. The chalk the second day was better but I was distracted by some of the students talking. Oh well, the message was spread. I had a few of the teachers tell me they were going to speak to there churches about having me. Over all it was a blessing to be able to get up and share. Now if I could just be more faithful to my call and to God. My mind just races at times and it gets to me. God is good

Big day

Well it starts tomorrow. As unfaithful as I have been in the past few years, the Lord is still calling me to tell my story. i will speaking at the local high school tomorrow about making good choices. As most of you know, I have the family history to speak on choices for years. I am nervous about it because it is so personal. i am also doing my first live chalk art presentation and looking forward to it. The art is still rough but is coming along. School has been pretty good so far and is a constant reminder the God is the man and that I am just a little piece of His plan. I need to buckle down on school though. A prayer is almost answered as I have an interview with the LFD tomorrow and things seem to be going in my favor. Rebecca and Kmac are doing great and I must say that Rebecca in her own unique way is so supportive of me through all my indescision. She is truly a blessing. My next blog will either be about how well God used me, or about how I tried to speak my own way and got in His way! God Bless
Justin

Stress relief

Well we have decided to join the blog world. Mostly Justin due to the fact that he is about to start seminary and wanted to use this as stress relief. Things are going well for us in Lubbock. Rebecca has a great job that she enjoys and Justin is to the interview portion of the hiring process with the LFD. It has been a true blessing since I will start seminary monday and the fire department job will give me ample time to focus on school work. I hope this is a great way for us to keep in touch with friends and family.